Soulful Sunday: How to Grow New Roots
I love how this tree found a way to grow here! After my own recent uprooting of a plan I had thought was solid, I thought I'd take you through the process of letting go of that loss of those roots. Teach you how to transmute it into something different. Wouldn't it feel so much better?
1. First step is always to feel the feelings.When we try and skip this step it only comes back later only stronger and in ways that interfere in our relationships. It's also the place where grudges are born. Grudges are simply stuck emotions. And stuck emotions will take hold of our body somewhere. That sudden back ache isn't a fluke.
2. After we let ourselves feel the disappointment, anger, resentment, jealousy ... whatever it may be, Begin - just begin (because it might take a while), to imagine a different outcome. Start directing your energy toward how we would like to feel. Try the flip it method - choose the opposite of what we feel now. Choose a word to help us get there. Consider that maybe there's something to learn here to help us grow.
3. Set our intention to shift our energy to that new emotional space. (Generous of heart, happy, content, satisfied, hopeful, curious, wonder, excited, flexible, open, caring...and so on) This is where we commit and declare it to be so.
4. Let it go. Take action to help our energy get to that new emotional place. Maybe it's coming up with a new plan. Or calling up a friend for support. Maybe it's actively spending time doing something to take our mind off it like going for a hike or to the gym to work out.
5. If and when those painful emotions creep back in (painful because now that we have felt some space from them we can feel just how painful those feelings are!), decide they are "old feelings" and now in this present moment we are feeling .... x,y,z ..." Sink into our new roots, breathe, allow space for them, meditate with them. Realizing we are the captain of our ship to the degree that we can re-direct in order to feel better.
6. After time has passed, check in with ourselves to see how we are. If there is any remaining sting or loss, go back to step one and repeat the process until at this point most of what felt terrible has been neutralized and we can feel good again.